Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
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Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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