About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
