Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
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