I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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