I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
