My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
