Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize