You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
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