miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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