So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
