so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
