do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
