sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
