i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
