My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
