that's an acceptable place to lick
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
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i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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