yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
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