I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
