just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize