Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
