But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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