okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
