is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
