I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize