4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
