Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize