i think i have herpe
just one?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
