I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
