yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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