Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
