Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
