New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
If its not for food we ain't going out.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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