So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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