I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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