Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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