ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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