Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
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