my mouth tastes like poor choices
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize