he shaved USA in his pubs
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
