I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize