Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
