I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
