i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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