This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I look better un-naked...
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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