Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
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