Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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