I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize