That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
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