No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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