oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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