Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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